On being a mother, series of drawings, 2021

Gallerie

In the first few months after the birth of my daughter in February 2021, I reduced my artistic practice mainly to drawing. However, it became a constant with which I reflected extensively and profoundly on this unique and intense stage of my life. The few hours, rather minutes, of daily drawing became my very personal time of rest and concentration on myself. Feelings, perceptions, needs, situations of everyday life - I just start drawing, quickly, while the child is still sleeping; see what's going on inside me - make me aware, show me what's on my mind. In terms of content and practice, the boundaries between diary and drawing, diary and art merge - which is why I basically count my diary writing as part of my artistic practice.

An infinitely valuable time for me and an incredibly satisfying, insightful practice that delighted, amused, surprised, amazed and confirmed me.

"My art is my diary"

Diploma exhibition Kunsthochschule Weißensee, July 2022 at Kühlhaus Berlin
Roominstallation combining 39 drawings of the "On being a mother" series, one drawing on the floor and a video projection (Super 8, 3'50 minutes, loop)

The video reflects on different stages of my life. Beginning with black and white scenes from the playground, showing details of hands and feet of playing children, impressions of the surroundings and myself moving within in, continuing with scenes filmed during the last few months of my pregnancy, in which I show watercolour paintings I did in this period, images of my own bowl-like belly in combination with jewellery that resemble the shape of a round form held by a bowl-like curve and then continuing with shots of words and sentence fragments i position on a white underground evolving into a poem about questioning one's identity, reflecting on being a woman, being a young woman, being a young woman mother, being a young woman mother artist. After these abstract textual elements I scroll watercolour paintings into one stock that show melting bodies of mother and child. The video ends with a shot of my feet walking through a landscape of toys and stuffed animals. 

The different parts of the video emerge to a collage-like diary of my past two years.

Pictures by Philomena Wolflinkseder

Videostills

On writing diary, series of drawings, 2021/2022

Gallerie

Since the birth of my daughter, writing a diary has become elementary for me. It is a cornerstone of both my psychological stability and my artistic exploration.

By writing diary I am in close contact with my inner workings. Writing makes me aware of many questions, needs, worries, fears but also certainties, joys and desires. I experience myself and my environment more intensively and get to know myself better. I have major changes in the way I treat myself, in the perception of my everyday life and above all in contact with my own inner voice. From the very beginning, I was incredibly fascinated by the enormously positive effects of the change in perspective, to look at oneself from the outside and to describe it.

"What is that, journaling? What does that do to me? And what does it mean to me?", became the questions of my diploma thesis.

In this context, a very large series of drawings and a written collection of reflections on journaling were created. I put these two elements in a cassette, which I made with the help of the bookbinding workshop at the Kunsthochschule Weißensee. It contains a stack of 60 printed drawings and a self-bound booklet with 120 pages (also made in the bookbinding workshop of the KHB) with handwritten notes.

The written reflections on diary writing are kept very open and reflect the process of work and the practice of diary writing itself, which is constantly supplementing but also often going in circles. Basic philosophical questions like "What is thinking?", "What is self-awareness?" and "What is the self?" are circled, whereby the extremely meaningful and clarifying function of writing a diary is described.